September 28, 2009

On Daaru Parties Bygone...

Yes, I used to drink like a fish and smoke large quantities of Nicotine per diem.Not only that, if there was vegetarian food offered to me I knew how to steer clear of it while letting off invectives at the poor soul who tried to offer it to me. Now, having given up Booze, Faggin AND Non Vegetarian food to boot, people might scarce recognize me. I know for sure a lot of my friends would take double or triple takes on hearing the news. Anyways, stumbled upon a blog by a close friend describing one drunken night about four years back, and it brought back some fun memories, so i couldn't help but copy paste the same here. So here it is - apologies to Das who really comes off worse in this story than the facts suggest. In fact, I'd rate him as the most fun person I've ever had booze with. Anyways, here's the (hi)story :

The Great Indian Daaru Party - 1st July 2005

I catch the first day 7pm show of Sarkar and rush to Bandra to meet up with my dear Iconos (members of my engineering group ICONOCLASTS) Das and Arka who are waiting for me at Toto's. I enter at around 10.30 pm to see our dudes on Pitcher No. 1. Arka seems comfortably high and is repeatedly told by the bar owner NOT TO DANCE. I ask Arko to chill and he is like: "Arrey bahut dekhe hain isske jaise... Maa %@#@# dalenge! We order Picther No. 2 at this point.

At around 11 pm, my colleague Surbhi joins us. Arko, the babe magnet, doesnt waste time chatting her up and soon the two are on back-slapping terms. We find a place to sit finally. By now, I have given Das enough gyaan about how engineering was a waste of time and now he has these 2 years at NICMAR to make it in life. Soon enough two more colleagues Shweta and Aparna join us. By now Arko and Das are totally freaking out on Whisky and Tonic. Das is totally sloshed while the rest of us are really HAPPY!

Das keeps entering conversations with gems like:
What, you motherfaacker! OR
What Shit she talking? OR
Shaat Aaap! You are South Indian (to my colleague Aparna).

Its 1:30 am and the place has closed down almost. Das has been in the loo for half an hour now. I go and get him out. Boy is he drunk! And now we bright (and drunk) people decide its a good time to go to a disc and dance.

So we take rickshaws and reach Shooters in Bandra. the girls go in first and the bouncer stops us as he thinks he cant allow Das in as he is too drunk. The ever intrepid Arko, balancing a semi-conscious Das on his able shoulders decides to give the bouncer a piece of his mind and while he is doing so Das does the unthinkable...

He pukes full blast on the bouncer and arko! While Arko goes off to wash himself and his bag, I seat Das on the steps near the disc.

I break out into an uncontrollable fit of laughter (2 mugs of beer ka effect) at the sight that surrounds me: Das eyes closed muttering to himself "Main theek hu" , Arkos washing vomit off his bag, a highly perplexed and distressed bouncer, and two women inside the disc who dont have a clue about the mayhem outside.

By now, Arkos and me are back to our senses, so Arko calls KT and takes Das to his place, while I go into the disc, gather the women and drop them home. All in all, a night to remember for a long long time.



Feel Free to comment below... :D

September 25, 2009

On Lords of Poverty...

Graham Hancock's books have always been excellent reads. See this earlier post of mine. Got my hands on another book of his today, will surely post a review once done but when you read this upfront:

" Lords of Poverty is dedicated to those senior staff at the World Bank who illegally acquired and read my original synopsis in the early days of this project. By attempting to limit my access to inside information they convinced me that the aid business does indeed have much to hide."

and when a dedication like that is followed by this poem:

The development set

Excuse me, friends, I must catch my jet
I'm off to join the Development Set;
My bags are packed, and I've had all my shots
I have traveller's checks and pills for the trots!

The Development Set is bright and noble
Our thoughts are deep and our vision global;
Although we move with the better classes
Our thoughts are always with the masses.

In Sheraton Hotels in scattered nations
We damn multi-national corporations;
injustice seems easy to protest
In such seething hotbeds of social rest.

We discuss malnutrition over steaks
And plan hunger talks during coffee breaks.
Whether Asian floods or African drought,
We face each issue with open mouth.

We bring in consultants whose circumlocution
Raises difficulties for every solution --
Thus guaranteeing continued good eating
By showing the need for another meeting.

The language of the Development Set
Stretches the English alphabet;
We use swell words like "epigenetic"
"Micro", "macro", and "logarithmetic"

It pleasures us to be esoteric --
It's so intellectually atmospheric!
And although establishments may be unmoved,
Our vocabularies are much improved.

When the talk gets deep and you're feeling numb,
You can keep your shame to a minimum:
To show that you, too, are intelligent
Smugly ask, "Is it really development?"

Or say, "That's fine in practice, but don't you see:
It doesn't work out in theory!"
A few may find this incomprehensible,
But most will admire you as deep and sensible.

Development set homes are extremely chic,
Full of carvings, curios, and draped with batik.
Eye-level photographs subtly assure
That your host is at home with the great and the poor.

Enough of these verses - on with the mission!
Our task is as broad as the human condition!
Just pray god the biblical promise is true:
The poor ye shall always have with you.

- Ross Coggins

Well , you know right then that come rain or hail, it's going to be a damn entertaining read.

P.S.: Sitting here in Francophone Africa I can easily identify with what he's probably going to say in his book.

P.P.S: Me extremely happy to see my reading habit reviving un peu in francophone Africa ( By Jove,it's not easy to find English books here!!!)

September 03, 2009

On Life not being too bad...

Manali happens to be absolutely a gadget freak and one those people who keep changing mobile phones more frequently than you or I would change clothes. But it's been a while since she's last changed her phone, and so when she went all ga-ga about the new Iphone 3Gs White with its 32 Gb memory and this and that avec bells and whistles , I just gave in...

...And got hooked myself ( people who have seen me with my endless string of abused lower end reliance phones can vouch for me not being even remotely in the same universe as gadget freaks )...but oh yes !!!... the iphone is IT..indeed eet ees!!

And that's why I now have bought myself ( an even smarter looking, but perhaps less feature turbo charged) iphone 3G 16 gb Black :

Oui, C'est vrai, mon vie, ce n'est pas mal pour le moment !! :D